041 What Really Makes Us Happy?

by Tysen on May 17, 2013

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happinesshappinessThis Week Dr. Matt & Tysen discuss what really makes us happy.

1. Happiness vs. Contentment: Get your definitions strait.

What are you aiming for? Intense happiness, or a lasting feeling of contentment?

2. There are many myths about happiness, here are a few:

  1. I’ll be happy when I’m in a relationship
    1. Many studies have shown that single people are not more or less happy than those in committed relationships.
    2. The happiness boost that is often reported by newly married couples only lasts on average 2 years. Then we return to previous states of happiness.
    3. I’ll be happy when I’m rich
    4. I’ll be happy when I have my dream job
    5. I’ll be happy when I lose weight
    6. I’ll be happy when I move to my dream city

3. Hedonic Adaptation: Beware! Human beings have the remarkable capacity to grow habituated to most life changes. Everyone becomes habituated to the novelty, excitement, and challenges of a new venture (job, relationship, lifestyle). Understanding this can help us stop seeing the grass as always greener on the other side and start cultivating the field we are standing in.

4. 7 Things That Really Make Us Happy?

 

 

Thanks for checking out today’s show. Make sure you’re subscribed to the podcast so you can receive our updated content as soon as it goes live! Finally, if you haven’t already done so, will you take a moment and leave us an honest rating on iTunes? That will be extremely helpful.

Thanks again for spending time out of your day listening to our show. We appreciate you and wish you all the best. – Dr. Matt & Tysen

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The 6 Vacation Languages

by Tysen on May 16, 2013

family vacation

The 6 Vacation Languages

By Matt Woolley, Ph.D.

 

Do you often feel like you need a vacation after your vacation? When you vacation with family or friends do you often feel that everyone is having a good time except you? The problem may be that you’re speaking the wrong language, the wrong vacation language that is. In order to reduce stress and increase happiness on your summer vacation this year I suggest learning to speak your own, personal, vacation language.

By knowing your vacation language, and that of your partner, kids, and friends you can speak the languages that make every vacation a winner. You see, what feels like a vacation to one person doesn’t necessarily feel like a vacation to another. Some people feel the need to relax, others may want to dive into something new and exciting, still others may feel the need to increase their knowledge and intellect. Any and all of these are great, but if you’re stuck on a vacation that doesn’t speak your language you’re likely to feel upset, worn-out, and resentful. You can fix that, permanently, by knowing your vacation language and that of the significant others in your life.

Below you will find the 6 vacation languages that people speak. As you read through them try to picture yourself on that type of vacation. The language(s) that you speak will be the language(s) that feels right as you visualize yourself engaging in it. Our vacation language will likely change depending on the needs we have in life at the time we are vacationing. It is also likely that you will want to speak more than one language on a vacation. You may want to speak multiple languages per vacation to optimize the experience.

What about the others that we are vacationing with? Nothing is worse than arguing about what to do on a vacation. It takes only a small bit of planning in order to make sure that everyone’s vacation language is being spoken. This will entail talking with your partner prior to the vacation about what you both need. It may be that you divide up one vacation into multiple languages, or it may mean that you plan more than one vacation so that you’re both getting to speak your language this year. If you learn to speak each other’s vacation language then get ready for a great time!

Let’s take a look at the 6 vacation languages. Remember to visualize yourself engaging in each and then evaluate which language(s) feels best at this time in your life. That’s your vacation language!

Languages:
1. Sleep & Relax: This language focuses on the perfect nap, laying about, getting a massage, dreaming in a hammock. Rest, rest, rest!
2. Unstructured Time: This language focuses on having no plan, sitting at the beach, leisure reading, and wandering. If it sounds good do it, if not, don’t.
3. Adrenaline Junkie: This is the language of extreme sports, theme parks, excitement seeking, roller coasters, a very physical time. Get ready to spend some energy!
4. Learn & Explore: This is the language of museums, historical sites, reading histories & biographies. You’re going to finally learn all about space travel, gourmet cooking, or U.S. history you little professor you!
5. Novelty: This language focuses on having new experiences, new places to travel and new foods to try. You’re putting credits in the life experiences bank and checking things off your bucket list!
6. Projects: Beware! Nobody likes this guy very much so you may be speaking this vacation language to yourself. This language focuses on staying home and getting projects done, chores and more chores. You’ll feel great, but you may be taking this vacation alone more often than not!

There you go! Which vacation language do you speak? How about your partner, kids, or friends? Start speaking your true vacation language this summer and get ready for the best vacation of your life!

If you have a great vacation story to share based on speaking your personal vacation language I’d love to hear about it and maybe I’ll share it on the show. Email stories to Dr. Matt Woolley at ask@theshrinkshow.com

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040 Assertiveness

by Tysen on May 10, 2013

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assertivenessThis week on The Shrink Show Dr. Matt discusses:

  1. What it means to be assertive
  2. What assertiveness is not
  3. Why some people aren’t assertive
  4. Benefits of being assertive
  5. 8 steps to be more assertive

Plus Dr. Matt answers a listener email from Matt about GAD.

Thanks for checking out today’s show. Make sure you’re subscribed to the podcast so you can receive our updated content as soon as it goes live! Finally, if you haven’t already done so, will you take a moment and leave us an honest rating on iTunes? That will be extremely helpful.

Thanks again for spending time out of your day listening to our show. We appreciate you and wish you all the best. – Dr. Matt & Tysen

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The Psychology of Iron Man 3

May 7, 2013

The Psychology of Iron Man 3 By Matt Woolley, PhD I saw Iron Man 3 over the weekend in IMAX 3D. My wife and I actually went to the 10:20 pm showing after being at the Real Salt Lake soccer game against the Vancouver Whitecaps (Real won 2 to 0!). For a guy over 40 [...]

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Why Star Wars Matters

May 4, 2013

Why Star Wars Matters By Matt Woolley, Ph.D.   I was 5 years old when Star Wars A New Hope was released in theatres. The experience of seeing that movie on the big screen at that young and impressionable age was powerful. Today, watching Star Wars in the comfort of my own home, I still [...]

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039 How Friends Affect Self-Control

April 25, 2013

Podcast: Play in new window | Download This week Dr. Matt and Tysen delve into how friends affect your self-control! Hear about the research and why it’s important. Dr. Matt answers a listener email about how to get children to listen to you. Plus he teaches 4 helpful steps to get kids to pay attention to [...]

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